I spend a lot of time waiting. Waiting until the kids go to bed. Waiting until the weekend. Waiting until winter is over. Waiting until I can sit down and write. I always seem to be waiting. The thing is: Waiting is a thief of joy. Let me explain...
If I think about it, I am always waiting. Like right now, I’m sitting on the end of my son’s bed waiting for him to go to sleep. Earlier in the day, I was waiting until the kids got home from school, or waiting until the kettle boiled, or waiting until something else. Parents in particular, we always seem to be waiting for something related to the kids, right?
It’s all too much waiting!
Now, I'm realising that life is in the waiting and the destination is death.
Sounds morbid, right?
It is. But I don’t mean it in a bad way. I mean that I need to try to start living in the now and keep my head out of the future. Because one day, the kids will have moved out, the mortgage will be paid off, I’ll be writing full time... and I’ll probably feel miserable lol, then guess what, after that I'll be dead (if I get that far).
Life is awesome.
I’m not just saying that. I genuinely think that. Yes, it’s hard, chaotic, noisy, exhausting, frustrating, heartbreaking, and whole list of other adjectives, but it is also amazing, beautiful, fun, rewarding, and an incredible gift.
Even right now, while I’m sitting on the end of a bed in the dark, listening to my twins make sleep noises, typing this with one finger and predictive text swiping on the new secondhand phone that my mum gave me, with the fire that my husband lit before he went to work in our fireplace. I can’t hear any arguing from my girls. Everyone is quiet and happy. I am writing, and I am warm and cozy, and now that I am thinking about it, this is totally a bottleable moment.
I feel positive that this is a moment that I will look back on with fondness, and one that I could easily have missed if I hadn’t taken this moment to be fully present.
So, right now, I’m no longer waiting.
I just am. Being. Here and now.
And I’m going to try to remind myself of this every day, ideally every moment of every day, because each moment is a moment that I won’t get back again and each moment contains it's own joy that I will miss if I'm waiting for something.
I don’t want to wait anymore. It’s not about the future, that will take care of itself if I take care of now.
I’m challenging myself to find joy in the time I get to listen to music in a traffic jam, or the joy in getting to read a book in a waiting room, or the joy in watching birds in the trees or the waving of the branches while I look out at the world outside as the kettle takes it’s time to boil.
This is mindfulness, right? Being fully present. Checking in with the senses, what I can see, hear, smell, feel, and taste. Bringing my thoughts back to right now.
That is joy.
A child might be having a tantrum, but there’s joy in the fact that they are here with me, safe, fed, clothed, and feeling comfortable enough to tantrum in front of me.
I might be running late, but there’s joy in the fact that I have somewhere to be, maybe access to an important service, possession of a reliable car, time available to do the thing, a healthy child, time to listen to the radio, or look up at the clouds in the sky, or maybe even have an important conversation along the way.
This mindset, this way of thinking and living, is true joy.
Can you see it?
It's all about gratitude, too.
How about we challenge each other right now to stop waiting and start living in the moment. This moment. Yep, now. Aren't you comfortable? Don't you have time to read this? Are the people that you love safe and healthy? Do you have everything that you need? Are you fed and clothed? Are there beautiful plants and trees around you? Do you have a home? Are there people who love you?
Yes! Right now. This is a moment that we won't get back, and this is the exact moment that you learn this secret to capturing joyfulness for yourself.
The key is keeping our minds in the present, checking in with our senses, and finding the good in each and every moment.
Then, you get to access true joy in every moment for yourself.
Are you in?
Tell me how you go!
Much love,
Marley
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